Introducing the Compassionate Hedonist Project
With bonus Beltane almanac!
Welcome to The Compassionate Hedonist Project! I’ll be using the sobriquet Lisel for this creative project. The concept of being a compassionate hedonist came to me during my deconstruction from Christianity. I brought my deeply held value of compassion for others from my spiritual upbringing into a new era of allowing myself to enjoy life without the heavy concept of “sin” being applied to every choice.
Undoing the internalization of harmful and misunderstood theology is a lifelong journey. I’m choosing a new path of exploration and inviting you to join me. The compassionate hedonist project will explore several mediums of creative expression: writing, illustrations, templates, zines, paintings, and music. I hope that the variety of my expressions will resonate with you and encourage you to live a life full of creative expression, enjoyment, authenticity. Will you join me on the journey of healing?
What do I mean by Compassionate Hedonist?
I was exposed to wide menu of Christian religious communities: Initially, we attended a charismatic church, where I learned to sing in harmony and was allowed to bring a “church bag” to keep me occupied during the long sermons. In grade school, we joined a Lutheran church, and I also attended their religious school. The shift from the Word of God Community’s worship music to the hymns and liturgy of the Lutheran service was jarring. After a move in middle school, I started attending an Assemblies of God school while still attending a Lutheran church.
I was curious about the variety of beliefs among different faith communities. Should I be baptized in the river at the annual picnic, or sprinkled by the Presbyterian pastor my dad is starting a church with? Is communion a symbol or magical transformation of the mundane to the divine? Is the world ending any minute, or is Revelations really about Nero and the destruction of Jerusalem? Am I eternally saved, or can I backslide and accidentally go to hell? This confusion infused my personality development in ways I uncover each week with my therapist.
One important lesson that transcended the different faith traditions was the compassion of Jesus. I was never confused about the value of extending empathy to others. I exchanged moral guidance from an invisible personality for the practical morality of mutual aid and kindness. As my belief slowly evaporated, the center of compassion remained as I explored the sensual world. Hedonism is a fun word for opening up my experimentation with new sensations. I (re)learned to enjoy my unique location in time and space by cultivating presence and enjoyment. Another term I like is Sybarite. A sybarite is a person devoted to pleasure, named after residents of Sybaris, who lived voluptuous lifestyles.
Life is short. The fact that I am alive at all amazes me whenever I sit with it for more than a breath. The preciousness of my time on earth generated a new Creed that I live by. It’s embarrassing to even share it, given its simplicity.
My Simple Creed
I exist
The past is a story
The future is unwritten
I exist in the present, in a sphere of influence
My priorities are:
Maintain my existence
Enjoy my existence
Use my influence to enrich my sphere
I’m glad you’re part of my sphere…to get a taste of my perspective, read on for Volume 1 of the Slow Growth Almanac: Beltane.
A poem
Upon learning bees use electricity to know flowers
On the lattice in the park
(in the dark?)
(after dark)
Grow the curling vines of light
(glows at night)
(electric light)
Flower fragrant dewy gleam
(like a beam)
(in my dream)
And the bees can read the glow
(of the grow)
(of the flow)
Lisel, June 11, 2016
Slow Growth Almanac, Volume 1: Beltane
Happy Beltane! May 1 is the midpoint between the spring equinox and the summer solstice. While the solstices and equinoxes mark the beginning of the next season, the cross holidays mark the peak of each season here in Michigan. Living near the 45th parallel, it’s still pretty early in spring for us! On the modest grounds surrounding Lisel Cottage, the trout lilies, trillium, and violets are blossoming. Last year, my snow apple was already blooming in late April, and the first year I was here it didn’t bloom until mid-May. The variations tickle something in my mind.
Noting these little things helps me be present with what is happening now, while considering the past and future with gentle curiosity. As I write this, the patch of striped squill is in full bloom, carrying a light aroma. The patch grows each year, resting in the little valley of my beech tree like some late-season snow. I’m pondering filling some old tins with cocoa butter for enfleurage of the lilac blossoms coming soon. I envision myself in the dead of next winter spraying my linens with extracted aromatics: a spritz of joy and hope on a cold depressing day.
Just munching on this idea is delicious enough. Actually doing it will be icing on the cake! But I’m gentle about that part. It’s not essential. The insanity of the world outside my sphere of influence, not to mention my own personal tragedies and struggles, weigh me down. Especially when the hormones start the peri-menopause jitterbug in my overstimulated grey matter. So, let’s take it easy. Let’s enjoy the flowers together and share them with our neighbors. Let’s get outside more and notice what is sprouting.
Let’s look for morels and ramps and come home for afternoon naps.
May you have a fragrant Beltane season while the sun grows to its full power on June 21, the Summer Solstice. If you’re interested in how I think about time and apply it to the shared reality of the calendar, you can download the Beltane Calendar. I’ll be explaining more about my almanacking (no that’s not a word) in the next newsletter.
Until then, thanks for reading! Please be sure with someone you think would enjoy it, and follow me on Instagram!
